Leadership continued…
Written on 21 August 2010 by Dave BettsDeveloping the Leader within You…developing-the-leader-within-you-notes.pdf
People centered Leadership
Written on 15 August 2010 by Dave BettsPeople centered leadership is a big leap from program or performance centered leadership. One focuses on achievement and produce, the other on fruit and re-produce. We live in a very relationally aware age where people are more than just tools to get a job done…Leadership vs. Management
Leadership requires that we keep the end in mind at all times. It never looks at what is but at what is to come. It is not interested in maintaining a status quo but rather an environment for growth.
Effectiveness vs. Efficiency
Asking the question what is the most effective way of bringing a change puts the person being trainined at the centre, asking how can I do this efficiently puts You in the centre. Is there a better way? It’s about asking the right questions. If you are dealing with very large numbers we often fall into the trap of efficiency. When we work on a reproducible mindset then we are only concerned with effectiveness. We never are dealing with large numbers, but rather with a core group. As we start to change out thinking so the questions we ask changes.
Spontaneity vs. Structure
Show a family that enjoys spontaneity and I will show you a secure family. We often hold on to our structures as they provide a sense of security, but in fact all they do is mask our insecurity. Our security needs to come from the depth of relationship we have with one another and not upon any external structure.
Discernment vs. Measurement
Measurement is good, it shows us how things have physically grown. We measure our children’s height, shoe size, we measure our spending etc. but we can’t measure our maturity, these things can only be discerned. If we were to spend more time discerning these things we would be surprised at what we find. Discernment again is centred in the other person not upon our own personal growth. It puts the other persons development at the heart of what we are doing. True leaders learn how to discern rather than measure.
Cause vs. Effect
This is the same as saying its all about the root and not the fruit. A trap that most leaders and parents fall into is to be reacting to the fruit or effect instead of responding to the root or cause. Often it is much easier to deal with the fruit of something or effect of something than it is the cause. Real leadership requires taking the time to unearth the roots that bring about the fruit. It requires understanding and much patience. In most busy programme driven environments we simple don’t have the time to do this and so we find ourselves chasing the effects over and over again. Getting our thinking right means that we need to constantly ask what is the root of this and make time to work it through. Again this highlights our need to be people centred not performance centred.
Release / empower vs. control
A controlling parent in a home always breads insecure kids. This is seen also over and over in business and family situations. A very controlling leader produces either REBELS or ROBOTS. Neither of them are secure. People who are not heard or given room to grow often rebel or just give up and toe the party line. Everything about making disciples is about empowering and releasing. Control is the paradigm of management but not family. Control is only necessary where there is no relationship and only works for a period of time. A controlling personality comes from the root of insecurity. To become releasing requires first that we become secure. If you need people you can’t lead people. If you need people around you to qualify you for your job you will never be able to release them. It is often much easier to do something yourself but if this happens all the time who learns? This is seen right through parenting, when you include the kids in doing a task it takes 4 times longer and is never as good. The short-term view is this is a frustrating exercise, however the long-term view is this is training for the future. We have to lead and parent with the end in mind always.
More to follow next time…
Punishment vs. Dicipline
Written on 9 August 2010 by Dave Betts
A new revelation of Grace is sweeping through the body of Christ in the world today. It is a beautiful thing to behold. For some it is bringing huge freedom and a sense of rediscovering Jesus, for others (mainly in church leadership) it is brining fear and confusion. This however is a normal reaction to any new or renewed revelation. The answer to knowing its origin is in its fruit and I am amazed at how this revelation is brining people including myself back into a real and genuine love for Jesus and a freedom from condemnation.I do want to add something to the already hotly debated issues. We have come into a real understanding that God will never punish us for our sin, he has dealt with that on the cross once and for all. So we do not live in the fear of punishment from God any longer. However we are Gods children and like natural parents he does from time to time need to discipline us. This is one area that we need to be confident in, God’s disciplines are essential for what he wants us to become. You see punishment has to do with the past. What I did, but discipline has to do with the future what I will become. God always disciplines us in the context of what he sees us becoming. When we are secure that God loves us, and is not angry with us, and will never count our failings against us, we can start to embrace his discipline as a son or daughter.This has really prompted me to look at the way I deal with my own children. Do we punish our kids or do we discipline them. Is it always in the context of their future? A real challenge not to just deal with what has taken place but to deal with the root and not the fruit of the action. This way we tap into something that affirms love and moves us forward towards our destiny.This is not only true for the way we parent but also the way we may Pastor or lead others. Are we willing to care enough to be involved in their future and not just their past or present.May the revelation of Gods never ending Grace continue to transform our hearts
WHO before WHAT
Written on 7 August 2010 by Dave BettsWell its been a while since I have put anything down on my blog, so here goes.
I was speaking to someone a few weeks ago, and it made me start to really question a few things. This Pastor was very excited about his pending church plant. He was excited about the venue, the name, the times of the services and the team that were going to come with him. Nothing wrong with that, all are great things but the longer the conversation went on the more i got uneasy. The one BIG thing that was missing in the conversation was the WHO. There was no clear direction on the WHO he was going to reach. The fact is that unless we get a handle on the WHO we cant even begin to start on the WHAT! The reality is that we are in danger of lots of more of the same. You see church planting has a winning formula, that is if you want to attract yet more christians to your services!
If the goal is to have a congregation to preach to each week, then go right ahead, find a hall on a Sunday, get a great band and her presto you are a sucess… however its another story if you start asking the question before you start, how do we reach those who would never come to church? lets be honest if they were going to go to a church like that, surley they would have gone already to one of the 50 or so that do exisit here?… just a thought.
What I am passion about, is for God to raise pioneers that are willing to break the mould by asking the WHO question before the WHAT… imagine what God could do with that!
Why Plant Churches (part2)
Written on 13 June 2008 by Dave BettsWHY PLANT CHURCHES?
This is the second part of a 2 part article drawn from research done by various church planters including Tim Keller & Mark Driscoll looking again at this crucial question of church planting.
In the last article we looked at the first question that we often get asked in regards to Church Planting…“We already have plenty of churches that have lots and lots of room for all the new people who have come to the area. Let’s get them filled before we go off building any new ones."
Lets have a look at the second key question that is asked… “Many people say, ‘what about all the existing churches that need help, doesn’t church planting detract from helping them”?
We also plant churches because…
We want to continually RENEW THE WHOLE BODY OF CHRIST.
It is a great mistake to think that we have to choose between church planting and church renewal. Strange as it may seem, the planting of new churches in a city is one of the very best ways to revitalize many older churches in the vicinity and renew the whole Body of Christ. I say this for these 4 reasons: -
First, the new churches bring new ideas to the whole Body.
There is plenty of resistance to the idea that we need to plant new churches to reach the constant stream of ‘new’ groups and generations and residents. Many congregations insist that all available resources should be used to find ways of helping existing churches reach them. However, there is no better way to teach older congregations about new skills and methods for reaching new people groups than by planting new churches. It is the new churches that will have freedom to be innovative and they become the ‘Research and Development’ department for the whole Body in the city. Often the older congregations were too timid to try a particular approach or were absolutely sure it would ‘not work here’. But when the new church in town succeeds wildly with some new method, the other churches eventually take notice and get the courage to try it themselves.
Second, new churches are one of the best ways to surface creative, strong leaders for the whole Body.
New congregations, attract a higher percentage of pioneer type people who value creativity, risk, innovation and future orientation. Many of these men and women would never be attracted or compelled into significant ministry apart from the appearance of these new bodies. Often older churches ‘box out’ many people with strong leadership skills who cannot work in more traditional settings. New churches thus attract and harness many people in the city whose gifts would otherwise not be utilised in the work of the Body. These new leaders benefit the whole city-Body eventually.
Third, the new churches challenge other churches to self-examination.
The "success" of new churches often challenges older congregations in general to evaluate themselves in substantial ways. Sometimes it is only in contrast with a new church that older churches can finally define their own vision, specialties, and identity. Often the growth of the new congregation gives the older churches hope that ‘it can be done’, and may even bring about humility and repentance for defeatist and pessimistic attitudes. Sometimes, new congregations can partner with older churches to mount ministries that neither could do by themselves.
Fourth, the new church may be an ‘evangelistic feeder’ for a whole community.
The new church often produces many disciples who end up in older churches for a variety of reasons. Sometimes the new church is very exciting and outward facing but is also very unstable or immature in its leadership. Thus some disciples cannot stand the amount of changes that regularly come through the new church and they move to an existing church. Sometimes the new church reaches a person for Christ, but the new disciple quickly discovers that he or she does not ‘fit’ the make up of the new congregation, and gravitates to an established congregation where the customs and culture feels more familiar. Ordinarily, the new churches of a city produce new people not only for themselves, but for the older bodies as well.
This is then why we say that Vigorous church planting is one of the best ways to renew the existing churches of a city, as well as the best single way to grow the whole Body of Christ in a city.
There is one more reason why it is good for the existing churches of the region to initiate or at least support the planting of churches in a given area. We plant churches—
As an exercise in KINGDOM-MINDEDNESS
All in all, church planting helps an existing church the best when the new congregation is voluntarily ‘birthed’ by an older ‘mother’ congregation. Often the excitement and new leaders and new ministries and additional members and income ‘washes back’ into the mother church in various ways and strengthens and renews it. Though there is some pain in seeing good friends and some leaders go away to form a new church, the mother church usually experiences a surge of high self-esteem and an influx of new enthusiastic leaders and members.
However, a new church in the community usually confronts churches with a major issue–the issue of ‘kingdom-mindedness’. New churches, as we have seen, draw most of their new members (up to 80%) from the ranks of the unchurched, but they will always attract some people out of existing churches. That is inevitable. At this point, the existing churches, in a sense, have a question posed to them: "Are we going to rejoice in the 80%–the new people that the kingdom has gained through this new church, or are we going to bemoan and resent the three families we lost to it?" In other words, our attitude to new church development is a test of whether our mindset is geared to our own institutional turf, or to the overall health and prosperity of the kingdom of God in the city.
Our challenge then is to keep our eyes on the BIG picture. To have a Kingdom mindset and willing to release the pioneers in our churches to Plant New Churches in the harvest fields
Why Plant Churches
Written on 13 June 2008 by Dave BettsWHY PLANT CHURCHES?
At the Elim general conference this year there was a real sense of momentum towards mission and church planting, with many churches from all sizes looking again at how they can get involved in planting new expressions of church in this nation. In light of this I have put together a 2 part article drawn from research done by various church planters including Tim Keller & Mark Driscoll looking again at this crucial question of church planting.
Introduction
The continual planting of new congregations is the single most crucial strategy for the numerical growth of the Body of Christ in any city, and the continual corporate renewal and revival of the existing churches in a city. Nothing else, not crusades, outreach programs, para-church ministries, growing mega-churches, congregational consulting, nor church renewal processes will have the consistent impact of dynamic, extensive church planting. This may seem like a radical statement but to those who have done any study at all, it is not even controversial.
The normal response to discussions about church planting is something like this:
“We already have plenty of churches that have lots and lots of room for all the new people who have come to the area. Let’s get them filled before we go off building any new ones."
This statement appears to be ‘common sense’ to many people, but it rests on several wrong assumptions. The error of this thinking becomes clear if we ask ‘
Why is church planting so crucially important?’
We want to be true to THE BIBLICAL MANDATE
Jesus’ essential call was to plant churches.
Virtually all the great evangelistic challenges of the New Testament are basically calls to plant churches, not simply to share the faith. The ‘Great Commission’ (Matt.28: 18-20) is not just a call to ‘make disciples’ but to ‘baptise’. In Acts and elsewhere, it is clear that baptism means incorporation into a worshipping community (Acts 2:41-47).
The only way to be truly sure you are increasing the number of Christians in a town is to increase the number of churches. Why? Much traditional evangelism aims to get a ‘decision’ for Christ. Experience, however, shows us that many of these ‘decisions’ disappear and never result in changed lives. Why? Many, many decisions are not really conversions, but often only the beginning of a journey of seeking God. Only a person who is being ‘evangelised’ in the context of an on-going worshipping and shepherding community can be sure of finally coming into vital, saving faith. This is why a leading missiologist like C.Peter Wagner can say, "Planting new churches is the most effective evangelistic methodology known under heaven”
We want to be true to THE GREAT COMMISSION. Some facts–
New churches best reach new generations, new residents, and new people groups.
Younger adults have always been disproportionately found in newer congregations. Long-established congregations develop traditions (such as time of worship, length of service, sermon topics, leadership-style, emotional atmosphere, and thousands of other tiny customs), which reflect the sensibilities of long-time leaders from the older generations who have the influence and money to control the church life. This does not reach younger generations. [Note: Often, a new congregation for a new people-group can be planted within the overall structure of an existing church. It may be a new Sunday service at another time, or a new network of house churches that are connected to a larger, already existing congregation. Nevertheless, though it may technically not be a new independent congregation, it serves the same function.]
New churches best reach the unchurched.
Dozens of denominational studies have confirmed that the average new church gains most of its new members (60-80%) from the ranks of people who are not attending any worshipping body, while churches over 10-15 years of age gain 80-90% of new members by transfer from other congregations.2 This means that the average new congregation will bring 6-8 times more new people into the life of the Body of Christ than an older congregation of the same size.
So though established congregations provide many things that newer churches often cannot, older churches in general will never be able to match the effectiveness of new bodies in reaching people for the kingdom. Why would this be? As a congregation ages, internal pressures lead it to allocate most of its resources and energy toward the concerns of its members, rather than toward those outside its walls. This is natural and to a great degree desirable. Older congregations therefore have a stability and steadiness that many people thrive on and need. This does not mean that established churches cannot win new people. In fact, many non-Christians will only be reached by churches with long roots in the community that have stability and respectability.
However, new congregations, in general, are forced to focus on the needs of its non-members, simply in order to get off the ground. So many of its leaders have come very recently from the ranks of the un-churched, that the congregation is far more sensitive to the concerns of the non-believer. Also, in the first two years of our Christian walk, we have far more close, face-to-face relationships with non-Christians than we do later. Thus a congregation filled with people fresh from the ranks of the un-churched will have the power to invite and attract many more non-believers into the events and life of the church than will the members of the typical established body.
Conclusion
In every country and in every mission focused movement around the world the call to church plant has never been louder. The evidence is overwhelming for the need for church planting. We need to be willing to release the resources and most importantly our best people into the harvest field to pioneer new and vibrant expressions of church.
Written on 9 May 2008 by Dave Betts
GRAND DESIGNS
I was watching a program the other day called Grand Designs. Its a programe dedicated to people who are building their dream homes. Just recently they did a special series of programs over a week, during which they endeavored to build a house from scratch in 5 days. At the end of the programe the house looked great, you could even live in it. It had all the latest stuff and built with the latest materials… the only difference was that it wasn’t built to last. It is possible to build something very quickly that looks great but the real question is will it last? We need to build in a way that will not only be able to reproduce and effect the surrounding areas once but do it again and again and again for years to come. Here are a few things to consider when building
Build slowly:
Dont become impatient. Impatience often leads us to taking short cuts often with people’s character and always always ends up in fall out and pain. You cant take a short cut when it comes to building something that will last. You may be the right person to lay the foundations of the building but you may need to hand over to someone else who has the skills needed to take it further. Knowing where your skill starts and ends is crucial to the finished building. Very few church planters have all the skills needed to plant and grow a church beyond the foundation stage. Putting in the right values takes time. It is often ‘caught not taught’ from you. It takes time for people to get what is in your heart.
Build scripturally not pragmatically:
There is a real temptation to just do what works. Avoid the temptation to go for the immediate result over the long term result. Often we can buy into secular solutions that look really good and deliver the results short term, but we are called to build according to the principles (the blueprint) of the word. If you deviate at this point the building will not stand the test of time. Is it built upon Gods principles or the latest leadership manual?
Build Simultaneously:
They say that only Woman can do more than one things at a time, but if you are a man planting or building a church then you are going to have to do it as well. Here is a list of things that we need to be doing at the same time. Preaching, Praying, raising the Priesthood, being in the lives of People, operating in God’s Power, working with the Poor, Planting more churches, Pastoring and caring for those around us and being Prophetic in all we do. Its when we only focus on one thing that the church we are building becomes unbalanced. We need to be embracing the ALL - NESS of the Bible in order to be the church that Jesus wants us to be.
Strategically:
Like in any building project it is important to have a plan. We must be careful that we do not build around pressure groups. As people join your church they will come with all sorts of passions and dare I say soap boxes. It is all to easy to give in to the loudest voice and steer the build in certain directions. Some like round windows and others think we should have no windows. Once you have set out the plans dont change them unless you clearly hear God’s voice. In your plans remember that we are NOT building with bricks and mortar, or clever programs but we are building with people. We build programs around people and not the other way around.
Build shoulder to shoulder:
The fact is YOU cant build the church on your own. You shouldn’t even try! Its about a team made up of skilled craftsman who are secure in who they are and what they are called to do. Every member of the team is important and is essential to the build. Every member must be believed in and trusted. Every member needs to know how they fit and be given room to explore that role to the full. On some occasions it may be necessary to play a member of the team out of position, the team needs to be flexible enough to pick up an area that they may not be best skilled in, in order to keep the build on track.
Its all about building with the end in mind. Constantly keeping the team focused on the artists final impression is vital to keep the motivation and energy needed to do the job.
Dont get so focused on the tree that you lose sight of the forest. After all God has called us to plant orchards not just an apple tree!
From Produce to Reproduce
Written on 15 April 2008 by Dave Betts 
The book of Genesis sets out God’s idea of success: filling the earth, subduing the enemy, making disciples through nurturing families? Is this what we are doing?
In order to think in the right way, we need to redefine what success is. It’s said that many businessmen look back at their life after doing well, but feel they climbed the ladder only to find it leaning against the wrong wall. This is also true of many people who set out in ministry. Their heart is set on building a big ministry, but after many years they realise that the ministry will never satisfy; that there will never be enough people in the church; that things will never be good enough. True satisfaction doesn’t come from producing a ministry, but instead through reproducing people.
When viewed through the lens of family, everything we do must be with reproducing in mind. The way we bring up, model to and discipline our kids is all in the context of what they will become. The opposite approach is to see everything with a ‘produce’ mindset. This judges everything by immediate deliverables; we count seats, programmes, money – anything – to help us ‘feel’ successful, because most of what we do is seated in produce. Many families today are crippled because parents try to ‘produce’ certain things in their children for their own ends, rather than with the children’s real interest in mind.
Reproduction is based upon our values, which make up who we are. If we want to reproduce disciples, then our values (our DNA) must be good. We see this in Jesus’ life. His ministry was not about producing miracles; rather, his goal was to reproduce himself in the lives of 12 other people so that they could change the world. What he did was a natural outflow of who he was.
The Bible starts with a family, and quickly grows into clans, tribes and eventually a nation. Each is dependent upon the other; each is a part of the other. Israel is a nation made up of 12 tribes: each distinct in its culture and function, but united together. This is a great picture of the Church: many tribes, but one nation under God. It’s also a pattern of how we should plant churches in our cities. Rick Warren uses the phrase ‘little and large’, describing the method of continually reproducing families while at the same time bringing them together to form a large tribe or church. However, this can only be successfully done if we get the first family DNA right, otherwise it quickly becomes another organisational monster. Getting that DNA right means focusing on becoming spiritual parents, not business leaders. First, this means leadership, not management. It means keeping the end in mind at all times; not looking at what is, but at what is to come; not interested in maintaining a status quo, but rather an environment for growth.
Second, it means effectiveness over efficiency. If we are dealing with very large numbers we often fall into the trap of efficiency. When we work on a reproducible mindset, we are only concerned with effectiveness. We are never dealing with large numbers, but rather a core group. As we start to change our thinking, the questions we ask of our ministry change also.
The third element is spontaneity over structure. We often hold on to our structures because they provide a sense of security, but in fact all they do is mask our insecurity. Our security needs to come from the depth of the relationship we have with one another, and not upon any external structure. The Holy Spirit is spontaneous; he often enjoys doing things differently. Just when you think you have it he changes the rules. How spontaneous are you able to be with your spiritual family?
Fourth, we must discern rather than simply measure. Measurement is good in that it shows us how things have physically grown, for example, our children’s height, or our spending. But we can’t measure our maturity (our spiritual depth); this can only be discerned. If we were to spend more time discerning, we would be surprised at what we find. Discernment is centred in the other person, not upon our own personal growth. It puts the other person’s development at the heart of what we are doing.
Fifth, we should look at the cause, not effect. A trap that many leaders and parents fall into is to react to the fruit or effect instead of responding to the root or cause. But real parenting requires taking the time to unearth the roots that bring about bad behaviour; it requires understanding and much patience. In most busy, programme-driven church environments there isn’t the time to do this, so we find ourselves chasing the effects over and over again. We need to ask, ‘What is the root of this?’ and make time to work it through.
Finally, we need to release or empower, rather than control. A controlling parent will always breed insecure kids, and this can be seen in church family situations. A controlling leader produces either rebels or robots – neither are secure, readjusted disciples. People who are not heard or given room to grow often rebel or just give up and toe the party-line.
Everything about making disciples is about empowering and releasing, but to be able to ‘release’ people we must become secure ourselves first. If you need people you can’t lead people. If you need people around you to qualify you for your job you will never be able to release them. It is often much easier to do something yourself, but if this happens all the time, who learns? We have to lead and parent with the end in mind always. If we are not releasing people to try out ministry and be given opportunities then all we are doing is breeding potential rebels or producing robots.
So let’s always keep our eyes on the big picture: a transformed and changed world; a vibrant, reproducing, spiritual community in every street, village, town and city.
Discipleship - ‘The missing ingredient’
Written on 28 February 2008 by Dave BettsDiscipleship is one of those words that you seem to see come up over and over again in most Christian articles. We have started whole movements based around it, and filled countless libraries with books on the subject. But are we any closer to actually doing it, by that I mean actually reproducing disciples?
At a conference I was at recently the over riding theme coming from the front was the desperate need to make true authentic Jesus Following disciples. It seems that even with all the knowledge about what a disciple is we still are missing some vital ingredients to making one.
I hopefully would like to shed a little light on this subject. In fact this is such a vital subject that if we dont get this right then our whole mission and purpose on this earth will not be realized.
A quick look at the great commission should help… Matt 28:19-20…Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptising them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." (from The Holy Bible: New International Version. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, by International Bible Society)
The question then is How do you MAKE a disciple? I guess also another good question is what is a disciple?
Our role as I am constantly repeating is NOT to fill buildings but to fill the EARTH. If filling buildings were the goal then we simply only need to make ATTENDEES. No if we actually need to reproduce to fill the earth then we need to make something all together different.
Our role is to help develop brand new baby Christians into mature interdependent spiritual adults.
Lets have a look at these 3 stages: - Dependent, Independent and interdependent
The DEPENDENT Stage
Dependent: Relying on or requiring the aid of another for support and survival. Someone who is subordinate, someone contingent on another.
This is the ‘baby’ stage. This is where the newborn Christian (especially if they have had no church background) starts off. This person requires constant feeding and nurturing. They need to be told what to read, how to read, what to listen to and how to listen. They will need regular reminding as to how they are to behave. They will be constantly seeking direction from you and looking to you for their confidence and affirmation.
The model of parenting needed for this early stage of discipleship is that of a King, hence the triangle picture above. We need to be strong and clear as to what the values are and where the lines are. We need to provide a place of security for the new disciple to grow in. Our presence in their life must be highly visible and frequent. All too many times new Christians are born, but are left to fend for themselves too soon. When we are involved in planting new churches with lots of new salvation’s it is a very busy time. Ask any parent of a newborn baby and they will tell you it is a mixture of fun and great fatigue. Midnight calls and lengthy talking sessions are normal for new Christians. The way we disciple in this stage is crucial to the future development of the new Christian. Now I don’t want to lessen the role of the Holy Spirit in all of this, as He is the great counsellor, but we have the responsibility to nurture and watch over in tandem with the Holy Spirit. Just a word of caution though: we must be careful not to take the place of the Holy Spirit, but keep pointing the new Christian to what He is saying to them.
The INDEPENDENT Stage
These are the teenage years. Ask any parent and they will roll their eyes upward and sigh. The saying, “Ask an 13-year-old, they know everything.” This is the stage that most pastors dread in growing disciples.
During this stage the growing child learns to take on responsibility and experiences some authority. They are empowered to make choices. This is where they start to question most things that are taught to them. It’s where they start to ask for themselves what things actually mean. They may even question some of the core values that have been taught them from an early age. In church circles this is a very challenging time. These people are often labeled troublemakers and rebellious. Now sometimes they are, but for most I think they are just growing up. Remember that a controlling model produces one of two types of people: Rebels or Robots.
However, if we are building people with the BIG picture in mind, this is a stage to be embraced. We need our people to start to challenge things for themselves for it is only when you have wrestled with things yourself that you truly own it. This stage is crucial for the development of strong spiritual fathers. People challenging our viewpoint should not threaten us. If we cannot bring a reasoned answer then what right do we have to hold such a view? It is not enough to build our lives on our parents’ or church leaders’ faith.
The model of leadership needed for this stage must change. I have drawn a triangle, but notice that this time it is on its side. This style of leadership must be vision casting. This is not the time to draw boundaries or teach right and wrong. This is the time to talk about values and vision; to inspire to greater things. I know, through experience, that this stage is the most difficult of all. Everything in you wants to use the submission word, but this just is not the time for that. Come let us reason together as the Word teaches; this is the time for long walks and lots of talking.
In my experience the best way forward is to give them a project to do in whatever way they wish. Allow them to make mistakes, but obviously watch over them and be careful who you let go with them. It is crucial that you give them the room to develop and learn for themselves. Most of the bigger lessons in life will be learnt at this stage. People need to have the room to try out their ideals; it is only through this that they learn to connect their ideals with reality. So many great potential ministries are killed before they start, because insecure spiritual fathers seek to confine and control rather than release. We need to learn to live with mess. A look at the NT church gives us a picture, not of perfect little churches, but often a lot of mess. God doesn’t seem to be phased by mess, but is very capable of bringing great ministries out of seeming chaos. If we are truly asking God for spiritual families then we need to be willing to live with people in both stages. We need to be able to discern what kind of leadership is required for each person. We can’t just have a ‘one size fits all’ style of leadership—to do that keeps everybody a child.
The INTERDEPENDENT Stage
This is the adulthood stage of life. This is the place where the disciple is able to feed him or herself, and not be dependent upon anyone else for their survival. They have defined their own values and calling. They have a grasp of their destiny and more importantly their abilities and limitations. They have bumped their head a few times, have had to stand down and at times stand up to various leaders. These people are highly reproductive. This was the goal that I believe Jesus had in mind for his disciples. It is the point at which he was able to commission them to go into the world and preach the gospel, make disciples…reproduce themselves. Jesus said to them, “these things and greater you will do.” His intention was not for them to always be under Him, but to be able to do greater than He did. Inter-dependence is the understanding that on my own I can’t fulfill the great commission, but in a team with others I am able to be more fruitful. This is the point at which disciples are able to embrace the true meaning of team: the covenant community we spoke of earlier; the picture of the Trinity. Later, when we talk about networking church families together, this stage will be crucial for the health and development of the growing network.
Again it is vital that we keep the BIG picture in front of us if we are going to build what God had in mind at the beginning. We need to be comfortable with leading people in different ways at different times. We need to be secure when we are challenged and we need to watch for the trap of being needed, which can be a snare that causes us to constantly keep our church in a place of dependency. The goal of a parent is to raise children to ultimately not need us. Remember that the Eph 4 ministry is that of equipping, not constantly doing. Once we have equipped we are no longer needed.
Back to the drawing board
Written on 21 February 2008 by Dave BettsRedefining success
I once was asked a question that at first seemed to have an obvious answer, but I was soon to discover that the actual answer to that question would radically shape my whole view of church and its mandate. So what was that question I hear you ask well here goes don’t say I didn’t warn you. The question was what’s the fruit of an apple tree? I know the answer that is going around your head; it’s an apple of course! Well is it? I also declared that answer confidently. The key to answering that question I guess is in the defining of the word fruit. You see the correct answer to that question as told to me was ‘another apple tree’. The success of the tree was not in the amount of apples it could produce but in the amount of apple trees that it was able to reproduce.
This question had the effect of challenging my paradigm of ‘what is success’ It led me to start to think about what I saw as success in the church that I was leading at the time. What was the measuring stick that I was using? What ‘fruit’ was I looking to produce? The mechanism for reproducing another apple tree is apples. They look great even taste great but its real purpose was to ensure that the world always had a bountiful supply of apple trees.
I was reading one day in Genesis and was quite struck by a passage that I had read many times before but this time it jumped out at me. Gen 1:28…God blessed them and made them fruitful and multiply, filling the earth and subduing it. Did you see it? There it was again, fruit and reproduction (filling the earth). I had to ask myself a question, was my measuring stick to short? Up until now my paradigm for success had been how many apples I had on the tree (names on the membership list). Could it possible be that the real measure of success was how many churches could we plant? I mean if the fruit of a disciple is another disciple then surly the fruit of a church family is another church family? You see it requires that change from produce to reproduce.
That leads me to another thought. That word family. I had called our church a family for years but to be honest it was one of those words that conjured up a warm emotion rather than a strategic word. I started to think again about that word family. Again I was drawn to Genesis. It occurred to me that the first thing God blessed was a marriage. In fact it was very plain to see the whole plan of creation was based around the concept of a family. 2 people covenanting together and the result being reproduction. By now my mind was spinning, firstly my whole paradigm for success was being challenged and now the method for attaining that goal was under the spotlight.
Then came another question, equal to the first. What is the goal of a family? Was it to see how many children you can have living in your house? I mean was a successful family really measured by the amount of children produced? If it were many of us would have to confess to failure. The real answer to that question which by now I know you have is that the goal of a family is to raise up mature inter-dependant adults who go on to start families of their own. Obvious really! So back to that phrase ‘church family’. I mean none of us would go along with ‘church business’ or ‘church corporation’. If that phrase of ‘church family’ is more than a letter head then it must demand of us a new set of questions.
Is the goal of your church to equip your ‘spiritual children’ to be ready to leave your church family and start a new one? Do we really have the goal in mind to train, equip and mature our congregation from dependants (babies) through to spiritual adults who can feed themselves, develop their own values and be able to reproduce a whole new inter-dependant family? These are tough questions. (I think the next time someone asks me a question I shall plug in my ipod and dutifully ignore them!).
Can you imagine for a moment what would happen if the goal for success was actually measured by the number of church families one could plant out. If every church in this nation planted out 1 church every 2 years, and those churches planted out 1 every 2 years this nation would again have a church on every street, in every community and in every village and town. Does this sound a little like a strategy for ‘filling the earth’? This kind of thinking messes with your head but also gets into your heart. I have to admit that for many years my goal was to fill the church not fill the earth. In order to change my paradigm of success I was going to have to change the whole way I go about church.
The biggest change I had to make was in the way I saw the people who turned up every Sunday to hear the message and worship together. I would find myself saying things like ‘if this is put right, or when this happens they might be a leader one day’. Is that how we think about our natural children? The fact is we know that they are going to be adults, the question is what kind of adults are they going to be? That changes my whole view on discipleship. If I don’t prepare them to stand on their own 2 feet, 1 of 2 things are likely to happen. Either they are going to never want to leave, (they will be 45 and still living at home expecting dinner on the table and washing done) or they are going to be out the door at the very first chance and quickly become disconnected to the family. This unfortunately can also been seen in some of our churches today.
If we are going to recapture the pioneering roots that every movement starts out with we are going to have to get back to some very basic questions. What is your measuring stick for success? Are we really looking to fill the earth or are we still counting the apples on the branch. The deeper we explore this the more challenges arise but I know that if we pursue His agenda and His mandate He will give us wisdom to over come every obstacle and see this nation and indeed the world filled
